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Stillborn But Still Perfect

Launa, our first child, was stillborn on May 17, 2009.

We were devastated.

We didn't know how to cope.

We went completely silent.

Launa Mae—Photo Credit: Shaun and Lavon Allred

After nine years and three healthy babies, we were absolutely crushed when Jaine passed at 36 weeks on June 27, 2018.

While they never breathed, these babies were perfect inside and out.

Testing was done. And an autopsy was done on Jaine in the hopes of getting answers. But we were never given a cause for their deaths.

Jaine Veloy—Photo Credit: Shaun and Lavon Allred

How do you fight the temptation to blame yourself as a mother?

How do you face the failure to comfort your wife or protect your child as a father?

We believe grieving is not about “letting go of” but “moving forward” with those we love.

We thought we had to let go and move on, but we have chosen to hold on and move forward. We also believe Christ is the true healer. (Matthew 5:4) Through our searching, we have discovered healing in blessing others. We created a gift shop to share one simple truth. “Life is a Gift”

We named our shop after our girls, Launa and Jaine. As parents of children who never took a breath we understand that life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. A beautiful gift, a card, or the right inspired words can shine hope in the darkest moments. We believe that if parents choose to remember their children and the gift that life is, they will do good for others and receive from others graciously.

By doing good because we have angels in heaven, we prove to the world that there is no foot too small to leave an imprint. The imprint they left on us is too big, too heavy, and too beautiful to keep to ourselves.

Photo Credit: Shaun and Lavon Allred

If every parent who has lost a child can find reason to show love to others because they have an angel in heaven, this world would be a better place. If you're lonely, please remember, you are not alone. If you are grieving, please remember it is an expression of love. It will carve at your soul and the pain can be unbearable. Yet, this suffering is because you love. It is similar to the love of Christ. As you grieve, seek to do good for others. You will find the scars you carry will serve as a witness to the love you have born. You will touch the lives of others and your baby will continue to bless this world.

Thank you Shaun and Lavon Allred, of Launa and Jaine Angel Baby Crafts, for sharing your story. Shared with permission.

We know that losing a child is the most heartbreaking thing a parent can experience.

Loved Baby is a beautiful resource to help grieving parents of faith through their darkest days.

Recommendations in this post contain affiliate links. We may receive a small commission if you choose to purchase.

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