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My Twins Were Gone Before They Got to Live

Photo Credit: Maria Moore

After years of trying to grow our family, we suffered more losses than I could imagine.

We underwent multiple fertility treatments. Our first was successful—until it wasn’t.

Then we suffered four more losses. Some had been conceived naturally, and some through treatments.

I was finally at my wits end both mentally and physically. I just couldn’t take anymore.

After a year of trying to heal, we found out we were pregnant. I was both excited and utterly terrified.

I went in for a routine ultrasound and to my total shock I was pregnant with not one miracle, but two.

The doctor had me in every week to monitor me closely because of my history. For that I was thankful.

At 12 weeks, 5 days pregnant, I randomly started to bleed and I thought that was it for my miracle. But by some chance it wasn’t. I was totally relieved and put on bed rest.

We continued on, excited and terrified, making it to the point when we could find out their gender. Our babies were both boys. We were more excited and hopeful than ever.

But on February 10, 2021, my world fell apart again.

My water broke at 1:00 a.m., and by 2:45 a.m. I was dilated and in labor. By 3 a.m., I gave birth to my two beautiful, perfect sons—Joseph and Vincenzo.

They were gone before they even got to live, but boy were they loved.

To my boys: Mommy and Daddy miss you both, always.

Thank you Maria Moore / @maria_enzaa for sharing your story. Shared with permission.

Recurrent pregnancy loss is a unique pain. Not Broken is a wonderful resource for those navigating the hurt of recurrent loss.

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