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My Universe Collapsed When I Lost Her

Photo Credit: Falbala Cloutier

I had two miscarriages before meeting my boyfriend and formalizing our relationship.

In March 2020, I experienced a third miscarriage.

Then in August, we started fertility procedures.

After a number of exams, I learned that I have PCOS. But that's when I got pregnant again.

My pregnancy was going well. We were delighted to be expecting a rainbow baby.

Toward the end of my pregnancy, my daughter's movement was decreasing and I was worried. I went to the hospital and was told that everything was normal.

But a few days later, I went back to the hospital and was told the worst words in the world: There is no heartbeat.

My universe started collapsing.

The next day, July 8, 2021. I gave birth to my daughter, Léanne, at 38 weeks and 4 days gestation.

I miss her so much. I am living in a great void. Here I am, the mother of the most beautiful angel. I love her more than anything in the world.

Thank you Falbala Cloutier / @falbala.cloutier for sharing your story. Shared with permission.

Pregnancy and infant loss can leave grieving parents feeling isolated and unsure how to navigate the heartbreaking circumstance of living without their precious baby. Unexpecting delicately helps grieving parents navigate the complexities and heartache of life after loss.

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