My Baby Girl Lost Her Life So Her Brother Could Thrive

Updated: Apr 4

I lost my daughter, Parker, 11 days after she was born from multiple organ failure and a very premature birth.


I got pregnant around Christmas of 2018 and found out in January, 2019. I was nervous, but so excited as this was my first pregnancy. My husband was also thrilled to find out.


My pregnancy, though, was terrible. I was constantly sick.


I went in for routine blood work and my numbers were really high, which led to an early ultrasound at 6 weeks. I was pregnant with twins, which seemed to explain why I felt to sick (double the hormones!)


The idea of twins didn’t sink in at first, but once it did I was nervous, but even more excited!


As my pregnancy went on we found out we were having a beautiful little girl and a handsome little boy. It was honestly a dream come true for my husband and me. We were both secretly hoping for one of each, even though we would've been happy no matter what.

I had a good run of being able to control my sickness but one day it got really bad again, so I stayed home from work. I ended up being very ill and stayed in bed all day and night.


I felt better the next day but still felt off. Around 5 p.m. that night I was feeling a lot of pressure in my lower abdomen. Naturally, I got up to see if I needed to use the restroom. Right as I stood up it felt like a balloon popped in between my legs. At first I laughed because I thought one of them kicked me in the bladder and I peed myself as this had happened before.


But once I got into the bathroom there was another gush of fluid and blood. I immediately called 911 and was rushed to the hospital. They confirmed I was in labor and tried EVERYTHING to stop it as I was only 24 weeks and 4 days pregnant.


Unfortunately, the doctor’s efforts were not successful and I had to have an emergency c-section.


We welcomed Parker Dawn at 10:40 p.m., weighing 1lb 4oz, and Luke Edward at 10:41 p.m., weighing 1lb 10oz. Both were rushed to the NICU and I didn't see them until the next morning.


Parker took the brunt of the labor and suffered a severe brain bleed. She developed an infection in her leg where her PICC line was. She was slowly deteriorating, and my husband and I felt helpless. Luke luckily had a very minor brain bleed and they were more confident in his ability to fight.

Image by Amanda Becker

The doctors met with us to discuss options for Parker. They all told us she would be severely disabled if we did choose to keep her alive. As tough as the choice was, my husband and I didn't want a life like that for our child. Parker would've been in the hospital constantly for appointments and follow-ups and, who knew if she would even be aware of the world around her.


At 11 days old we chose to say goodbye to our beautiful girl. She passed 11 days after coming into this world and leaves a lasting impression on everyone. I truly believe she gave up everything so her brother could thrive because he was able to fully recover with minimal complications. After 136 days in the NICU we finally brought Luke home.


We always remember Parker and have all of her things from the NICU in a box to always look back on. I am looking forward to sharing that with Luke when he gets a little older.


Thank you @aibaldwin123 for sharing your story. Shared with permission.

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